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At Swim Two Birds - In Bed With Your Best Friend

In Bed With Your Best Friend

In Bed With Your Best Friend

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As the sun rose up into the sky
And all I could hear was birds' song
And the hackneyed tongues of Radio 1
I knew something was wrong

And as I lay and tried to remember
The tightly closed eye
I felt soft warm fingers trace across
From the small of my back to the inside thigh
Bite your lip, pretend you're asleep
And hold your breath and count to ten
And when you open your eyes
Just hope you're back in bed
With your girlfriend again

I recall a bottle of vodka
Passed among friends
And a strange party piece
With a Swiss army knife
Just me and your girlfriend
Or is she your wife?
I know my bedroom's white
And this one's green
With posters of bands I hate

And there's a whiff of petunia
I know it's not me
An air of hell and decaf tea
And as a breast or two squash into my back
A rambling yawn floats over
And it smacks me in the mouth
Just what this is all about
I'm in bed with your best friend

I've never done this sort of thing before
And I swear I was drunk
And I can't believe the depths to which I sunk
Now I know it's been hard
And I know I've been weird
But with your job in the building ground
You can't blame me
It's just one of those things
We'll see it through
From this second now it's just me and you
And there's the chirps of cocks
Assault my ears
A rambling hand takes over
And I contemplate murder
The scene of the crime
The guilt and the victim weigh heavy on my mind
Perhaps a simple diversion
A leap and I'm gone
Deny it ever happened
It's the drugs she's on
And I can't see my clothes anyway
They're probably lining the stairs
All down through the hallway

As I turn to confront her
To tell her the truth
Those eyes
That mouth
Those shoulders
Those shoulders
I'm in bed with your best friend
I'm in bed with your best friend
I'm in bed with your best friend
I'm in bed with your best friend
I'm in...

 

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