MF Doom - Deep Fried Frendz

[Intro]
Before we go any further..FRIENDS!

[MF Doom]
As you call 'em, they call you when they need something
Trees for the blunt, the g's for the front
I found a way to get piece of mind for years
And left the hell alone, turn a deaf ear to the cellular phone
Send me a letter, or better, we could see each other in real life
Just so you could feel me like a steel knife
At least so you could see the white of they eyes
Bright with surprise, once they finish spitting lies
Asssociates, is your boys, your girls, bitches, niggas, homies
Close, but really don't know me
Mom, dad, comrade, peeps, brothers, sisters, duns, dunnies
Some come around when they need some money
Others make us laugh like the Sunday funnies
Fam be around whether you paid or bummy
You could either ignore this advice, or take it from me
Be too nice and people take you for a dummy
So nowadays he ain't so friendly
Actually they wouldn't even made a worthy enemy
Read the signs: no feeding the baboon
Seeing as how they got ya back bleeding from the stab wounds
Ya'll know the dance, they smile in ya face, ya'll know the glance
Try to put 'em on, they blow the chance
Never let your so-called mans know ya plans
(How many of us have them?)a show of hands
(FRIENDS!)
Is a term some people use loosely
I'm real choosy on what I choose to let crews see
You telling me, I try to act broke
Jealousy, the number one killer among black folk
Fellas be under some type of spell, like crack smoke
Ghetto Cinderellas, lead 'em right to your stack, loc
Just another way a chick'll lead to your end
I check the dictionary for the meaning of Friends
It said: Person, one who likes to socialize with
Sympathiser, helper, and that's about the size of it
Most of the time these attributes is one-sided
To bolster the crime, they apt to shoot you through your eyelid
And they can't hide it, going wild like a white bitch
Sometimes ya need to cut niggas off like a light switch
(Click!) and when things get quiet
Catch 'em like a thief in the night (Bow!) what a riot
I first met Mister Fantastik at a arms deal
Don't let it get drastic, think of how yer moms'll feel
When it get for real, the steel get to sparking
Everything darken, and ain't no talking
For somethin so cheap it sure buys a lot of trouble
Ya better off focusing than tryin to plot to bubble
Or else it'd be a sad note to end on, the guns we got is
(One's we can depend on..FRIENDS!)
Some come in the form of co-dependence
Alotta times only end up bein co-defendants
Ten bucks say they tell for a lower sentence
And leave you up under the jail, beggin for a penance
It don't make no sense, what happened to the loyalty?
Honor amongst crooks, trust amongst royalty
I'd rather go out in a blaze, than give 'em the glory
(How many of us have--) a similar story
(FRIENDS!)
Before lovers we used to have some type of overstanding
Just so when I let her get the man thing, she know its no strings
We could do the damn thing, but ho its no rings
Just how the tramp swings, will she see 'em again?
That depends on how good was the skins
And could she memorize the lessons, it ain't no need to pretend
Even though she let 'em stab it, [she know they just friends]

[Outro]
(FRIENDS! How many of us have them?
FRIENDS! Ones we can depend on?
FRIENDS! How many of us have them?
FRIENDS! Before we go any further)

Fellas! Don't be silly! I know who my friends are
And the next nice neighborhood I move into
You guys'll get crack