Midwxst - Smile

I've been on the edge for a while
It's getting hard to be this scared and hold a smile
I don't who I should call or I should dial
I know I need some help, but that's just as fine, oh
All the shit that goes on inside my head
All the tears that have fallen have been shed
All the times that I've been cut like some thread
I can't describe, but I've been running out of my meds
You say you need me, but push me off to the side
I can't tell if you're telling the truth or telling me lies
I never knew how I should open up, I caved in inside
And nobody better help me, wanna hear my cries
And you said that you got me, but I already know that you don't
I didn't need your fuckin' help so leave me the fuck alone
I don't got a lot of friends on me, used to being alone
I don't like to go outside, I'm always stayin' at home
Why you always gotta talk, talk, talk, talk, talk?
All I hear is fuckin' blah, blah, blah, blah, blah
I don't like you, now you're blocked, blocked, blocked, blocked, blocked
You're my friend, no no you're not, not, not, not, not
I kinda wanna go out, but I know what might go wrong
I be staring at my feelings, tell the barrel of this gun
And I talk about my feelings, no, they always getting shunned
And I'm losing track of time, always feeling so alone
Lately been scared, not leaving the house
And I'm feeling really jealous of the people they around
So I close my eyes and I shut my mouth
It's the funniest shit when it all goes-
That sucks, shit-faced
I tried to be kind, that's a mistake
And they act like we're friends but it's all fake
I'ma air out the laundry for display
Tell me, do you know my hurt?
You never will until you see your brother on a shirt
But it's okay 'cause I'm without my brain
Fun-funny thing, before I'm 17
And I know that you don't notice when I try
I got way too much on my mind
And now I'm asking myself, am I even depressed?
And before I go, please tell me, why?
You say you need me, but push me off to the side
I can't tell if you're telling the truth or telling me lies
I never knew how I should open up, I caved in inside
And nobody better help me, wanna hear my cries
And you said that you got me, but I already know that you don't
I didn't need your fuckin' help so leave me the fuck alone
I don't got a lot of friends on me, used to being alone
I don't like to go outside, I'm always stayin' at home
Why you always gotta talk, talk, talk, talk, talk?
All I hear is fuckin' blah, blah, blah, blah, blah
I don't like you, now you're blocked, blocked, blocked, blocked, blocked
You're my friend, no no you're not, not, not, not, not
Why you always gotta talk, talk, talk, talk, talk?
All I hear is fuckin' blah, blah, blah, blah, blah
I don't like you, now you're blocked, blocked, blocked, blocked, blocked
You're my friend, no no you're not, not, not, not, not