Andrew Lippa - What If

Pugsley:

What if she never totures me anymore?
How would I manage?
What if she never nails my tongue
To the bathroom floor?
What if she walks away
Leaving me a-ok,
Hiding each power tool
Why would she be so cruel?

I could stab my arm myself
Could rip my tonsils out
Could set my hair aflame
I could spray my eyes with mace
But face the fact, without her,
It wouldn't be the same...

Pugsley (Spoken):

Grandma, what if there was this girl who met this person and they're gonna run away and live alone and eat apples.
What would you give her?

Grandma (Spoken):

Nothing. She's your sister. Be happy for her

Pugsley (Spoken):

But what if she doesn't get rid of him? What if all the good time are already behind me?

Grandma (Spoken):

That's life, kid. You lose the thing love.

Pugsley:

Wednesday will drink and then
She'll be herself again
Lucas will leave her be
So she can torture me
Just like she always did
'Til then I'm just a strange, fat kid