Ethel Merman - Lichtenburg

I don't think you know much about us
Except, of course, our famous Lichtenburg cheese
I know very well you enjoy it
And we would enjoy it too
But we can't afford it for we must have money
And so we send it to you
But Lichtenburg won't be offended
We'll manage to stay alive
We're not very touchy
This quaint little duchy
That somehow seems to survive

Too small to be a city
Too big to be a town
Too poor to have an army
And too easy to knock down

Too little to sell across the seas
Babies and cheese are our main industries

Too slow to please the young folk
Too fast to please the old
Too many who have copper pennies
Too few who have gold

But somehow we manage to play the game
While the other lands keep changing hands
Old Lichtenburg stays the same