Grant Knoche - First Hello

Staring at my ceilin'
Convince myself it's nothin'
Pray to God to fix me
Feeling guilty havin' thoughts at 12 years old
Is mama gonna like this?
I'm riskin' her of grandkids
Seven years of fighting, and I don't wanna fight no more

So I wanna let it out
Wasn't ready then
But I'm ready now

I want my friends to know me
Like, really, really know me
I hope this doesn't change things
They say that boys don't cry
But newsflash, that's a lie
I don't fit inside your boxes, I can't stop this, no

So I'm counting down
Unlock my cell
And come on out

Oh, my, beautiful bliss
I'm so foreign to this
Tell you what my walls know
Here's my first hello

Oh, my, such a relief
I can be me
I don't put on no show
It's my first hello
It's my first hello

All that I said, all that I did
I learned to lock my thoughts up carefully
I held my breath, I broke my heart
I bit my tongue, it starts to bleed
And I, I hope you know that it's not your fault

Hope my father understands
I'm not any less a man

Oh, my, beautiful bliss
I'm so foreign to this
Tell you what my walls know
Here's my first hello

Oh, my, such a relief
I can be me
I don't put on no show
It's my first hello
It's my first hello

I wanna let it out
Wasn't ready then
But I'm ready now