Jacek Kaczmarski - Limeryki o narodach

There was an Englishman who made friends with a Hindu
Out of purest conviviality, and not under pressure.
To this day it would have endured
This fantastic friendship,
But the Hindu gave him some stale cheese.
It is hard to blame the Englishman,
When his comrade touches his national pride.
So he cast aside the pariah
And his friendship in time
He lay at the feet - of an Irishman.

Nations, nations! Why the devil nations?
Which stand in the way of joy and agreement?
History gives us definitive proof:
You want peace? - Remove the barriers -
Nations, nations, nations!

Once a Frenchman had a neighbor from Somalia,
In Toulouse they lived and pastis they would drink.
But soon he found out
Danton's descendant
That his comrade has a head made of steel.
The Frenchman's mates had no regret,
that he couldn't drink the black scoundrel under the table.
But they pronounced: Mon Ami,
You want to drink - drink with us!
For Toulouse is not for vagrants.

Nations, nations! Why the devil nations?
Which stand in the way of joy and agreement?
History gives us definitive proof:
You want peace? - Remove the barriers -
Nations, nations, nations!

Once a Chinese fell so hard for a Japanese lady,
That with vistas of matrimony he would present her,
But The Flower of The Cherry Blossom Country
She said - I wouldn't dream of it!
Look in the mirror - but your eyes are crooked!
What in the world to do with a broken heart?
So he joined the army and dreamt of revenge.
But - oh the irony of fate! -
A lack of war with Japan
Today he shoots monks in Tibet!

Nations, nations! Why the devil nations?
Which stand in the way of joy and agreement?
History gives us definitive proof:
You want peace? - Remove the barriers -
Nations, nations, nations!

A Sinhalese once felt affection toward a Tamil,
Though enmity divided their people in Sri Lanka -
The old Ceylon,
Where there are elephants even
So wise in their politics
But the Snhalese's elephant - a Tamil sympathizer -
Used to night after night steal his pomegranates,
And the Sinhalese understood,
That he must, though with pity
Write off his sympathies

Nations, nations! Why the devil nations?
Which stand in the way of joy and agreement?
History gives us definitive proof:
You want peace? - Remove the barriers -
Nations, nations, nations!

There was too a Palestinian, who broke bread with a Jew
As in this friendship he saw hope for the world,
As he fired at him
He repeated: Comrade,
This blood will unite us for years .
But in such friendship the Jew saw but no virtue,
For he was in no mood for new Golgothas,
So he said - friend,
We here, in Israel
We have no work for you!

Nations, nations! Why the devil nations?
Which stand in the way of joy and agreement?
History gives us definitive proof:
You want peace? - Remove the barriers -
Nations, nations, nations!

A Libyan, though he had three wives, all Muslim,
A Chaldean he invited to his mud hut
And he said: For example
I will make hay with you
And he took her - evenings and mornings.
And although love can overcome immense obstacles -
The Libyan for his deed did not collect applause and
For the good of social-
Ism they took her from him
Those, raised by Gaddafi

Nations, nations! Why the devil nations?
Which stand in the way of joy and agreement?
History gives us definitive proof:
You want peace? - Remove the barriers -
Nations, nations, nations!

On Cyprus there was a Turk, whose friend was a - Greek,
They were both kidnapped by their local security.
During prisoner exchange
They met at the gate -
Without a word they passed - man to man
Shortly after a Greek among the Turks, a Turk among the Greeks
At the same hour they faced the wall.
Shortly after
Over one and the other
Rises a sandy hill

Nations, nations! Why the devil nations?
Which stand in the way of joy and agreement?
History gives us definitive proof:
You want peace? - Remove the barriers -
Nations, nations, nations!

Breathless having drank five teas in a teahouse
An Albanian fell in love with a Serb,
But the Serb - after a Slivo-
Vitz - On the Albanian's
Teeth etched his pedigree.
A toothless Albanian - is half an Albanian,
Many a politician stumbles upon it,
Tita's spirit wails
That redundant is a politician,
Where a teeth-puller is needed - a practicality.

Nations, nations! Why the devil nations?
Which stand in the way of joy and agreement?
History gives us definitive proof:
You want peace? - Remove the barriers -
Nations, nations, nations!

There was a Russian - it is not his fault -
Had for a brother a certain Georgian.
The time of kinship was short,
Because the other drank no vodka,
And the Russian drank no wine.
So he sent a denunciation where it would cause harm
And a tear he cried reinforced.
And the Georgian in a gulag,
Twelve years had rotted,
But him too they eventually let go.

Nations, nations! Why the devil nations?
Which stand in the way of joy and agreement?
History gives us definitive proof:
You want peace? - Remove the barriers -
Nations, nations, nations!

All those about whom I drag on here
Each day they meet at the United Nations
And they all complain
About lands and peoples,
But the misery they disregard.
Because they all have such agreements
Where nation goes against nation,
That it does not matter,
Who will lose out in the end
Only that - how much is the dollar.

Nations, nations! Why the devil nations?
Which stand in the way of joy and agreement?
History gives us definitive proof:
You want peace? - Remove the barriers -
Nations, nations, nations!

There was a Pole-a patriot, who next to a case of vodka
Made friendly pacts with an Ukrainian.
From word to word
They reached Lviv
They fought like two warthogs.
When they were finished they wound up behind bars
All resounding tracts in their memories had been anulled:
Because when the time comes -
You us, and us you!
Over our bellies! And: 'Budem rezaty'! *

Nations, nations! Why the devil nations?
Which stand in the way of joy and agreement?
History gives us definitive proof:
You want peace? - Remove the barriers -
Nations, nations, nations!

Ah if only in the world there were no nations,
How wonderfully we all would live.
For the good of mankind, for the joy of humanity
Bound together in a crush of love so strong
That the bones would break from the tension.

Another Serb who liked to climb trees
From where with longing he could see Sarajevo
With a sniper's scope
To Bosnian women
He would send his love
They fell as ducks stricken with diplomacy
Bosnian women Islamic and Orthodox
And the world nagged
That a Chetnik's brawn
Has a character too barbaric

Nations, nations! Why the devil nations?
Which stand in the way of joy and agreement?
History gives us definitive proof:
You want peace? - Remove the barriers -
Nations, nations, nations!

An Armenian fell in love with a tan Azerbaijani
At his feet he unfurled his heart like a rug
Until fear had consumed him
For he lived in Karabakh
So now he's consumed by hatred
Though he believed in Christ and the Azerbaijajani in the prophet
But both were devoured by an apo-
Calyptic maw of madness
Which changes a rug into a pall
Each day in the blink of an eye

Nations, nations! Why the devil nations?
Which stand in the way of joy and agreement?
History gives us definitive proof:
You want peace? - Remove the barriers -
Nations, nations, nations!

After years of separation again like two Germans
A Saxon and a Bavarian took eachother by the hand
Not soon enough there are warning signs
That the finances are thinning
In a union forged in a hurry
There is advice for fears we will preserve the uni-
Fication when communism threatens no longer
As the young had pointed out
When there's time to make peace
It is all the fault of the Romanians

Nations, nations! Why the devil nations?
Which stand in the way of joy and agreement?
History gives us definitive proof:
You want peace? - Remove the barriers -
Nations, nations, nations!

A Spanish Hidalgo was kissing a Basque girl
So that they be united by more than just words
Before all his lies had ended
She snuffed out the Hidalgo
Her passion much too explosive
The deed in Spain had not won applause
From now on there will be no mercy for the Basques
Because only now
Understood the Torero
Not to take a Basque girl without a helmet

Nations, nations! Why the devil nations?
Which stand in the way of joy and agreement?
History gives us definitive proof:
You want peace? - Remove the barriers -
Nations, nations, nations!

Once to an Ossetian a Georgian said my be-
Loved do not depart for you will hurt me
Where the sea rustles
The color blue
Though Black they call it in Sukhumi
The son of Ossetia this Georgian patter
Ready with blood on a map to ammend
Said - deny your illusion
I will not live in Georgia
Though the Russians again try to make our amends

Nations, nations! Why the devil nations?
Which stand in the way of joy and agreement?
History gives us definitive proof:
You want peace? - Remove the barriers -
Nations, nations, nations!

A Khoza with a Zulu disputed on a Sunday
Before which of them a brighter future shines forth
The Zulu said my friend
Believe in Buthelezi
The Khoza said now you believe in Mandela
A tribal hatred the discussion dragged up
And red blood from black torsos bled forth
In all which a moral will be found
That even in apartheid
The fate of the black man is always hard

Nations, nations! Why the devil nations?
Which stand in the way of joy and agreement?
History gives us definitive proof:
You want peace? - Remove the barriers -
Nations, nations, nations!

There was a Pole who regaled with wine a Lithuanian
It was probably the wine that a disagreement resulted
They battled hard
The Eagle and The Knight
The insults poured forth "Slavemaster", Cabbagehead"
Quo vadis? Vinicius would ask
Today nothing more ties the Lithuanian and the Pole
The patriot attacks
The Lithuanian defends
That the name of our national bard was Mickiewicius

Nations, nations! Why the devil nations?
Which stand in the way of joy and agreement?
History gives us definitive proof:
You want peace? - Remove the barriers -
Nations, nations, nations!

A new world order glistens pink as the dawn
Nations, nations, nations they multiply
One after the next for the sake of peace
They cast off the chains and rise up to battle
It may not be soon before they lay down.



* Russo-Slavic for: 'We will cut/cut down'