Ava Beathard - Never Feel Clean

I keep taking showers, think I'll never feel clean
And doing loads of laundry 'cause this feeling just never leaves
I'd rather Google ways to stop wishing I'm dead
Than go outside and wish I was with you instead

I'll fill my bath with every chemical I own
Just so that I'll forget what it's like to be known
Can't wash away the feelings I once had for you
But hell, I can scrub my skin raw 'til I feel brand new

And it's getting hard to breathe
'Cause I'm choked up by the steam
The water's overflown
And I'm swimming towards the door

I keep taking showers, think I'm running out of soap
But maybe doin' laundry ain't the worst way to cope
I'd rather search for reasons not to crash my car
Than watch you drink yourself to death inside that bar

And it's getting hard to breathe
'Cause I'm choked up by the steam
The water's overflown
And I'm swimming towards the door