Reel Big Fish - Secret Song

Aaron: Scott, do you fuck the bitches?
Scott: Um, try to.
Band Member: You slap the hoes?
Scott: I, I try to fuck the bitches but the bitches don't want to fuck me. That's my rap.
Band Member: That should be a song, right there.
Scott: Yeah.
Band Member: That's right.

Scott:
I try to fuck the bitches but the bitches won't fuck me, fuck me, fuck me
I try to fuck the bitches but the bitches won't fuck me, fuck me
I try to fuck the bitches but the bitches won't fuck me, they duck me, it sucks to me, yeah

That was my gangster-rap-move noise.

Dan: You better cut it out!
Aaron: You better cut it out.
Dan:Don't make me lose my temper!
Aaron: Don't make me cut it out.
Dan: Cut - it - out.

Dan: Alright, that's a great rap guys.
Aaron: Scott's on the rag. Wait, Dan's on it. Are you on the rag?
Dan: Yup!
Aaron: I figured so. ...on the fuckin' rag, get off it.

I had his dad's dick in mine, you know?

Aaron: I may as well fart again.
...
Aaron: Come walk back where I farted, guys. Ha, ha, ha.
...
Aaron: Oh, boy. Oh, God.

Band Member: Hey, Scott.
Scott: What?
Band Member: Work with me on the bridge, my man.
Scott: Where are you going with it?
Band Member: I don't know, man, just work with me.
Scott: Shit, okay.
Band Member: Heh, heh, heh.

Andrew: Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you. Fuck you.
Aaron: Hey, Andrew, guess what?
Andrew: Fuck you. Fuck...
Aaron: Jerk.
Andrew: Fuck you!

...of the night
Oh, oh

Band Member #1: Swell, swell.
Band Member #2: What key were you singing in, guys?
Band Member #1: The key of 'fuck.'
Band Member #2: I was singing in the key of 'shit.'
Band Member #3: The key of 'pee in my butt.'
Band Member #2: What is with urine in your butt?

Vagina.

Band Member #1: Okay, fellas. Let's take this one. What do you say? I can't hear my guitar. Ready and hit it for me.
Band Member #2: You don't play guitar, cocksucker.
Band Member #1: So what the key is this, uh, song in for me to play the, the Aaron's stupid guitar part? Is it in the 'E'? I'll play this 'E' right here. Okay, ready. The funky Aaron guitar part here. The funky guitar Aaron guitar part. Ooh, yes; get funky. Hello, hello. We are being the funky. Yes, great funky times. Oh, I love it and being and funky. And now I'm, I'm going to say some more funny things, some more funny things for the kids - on the microphone. Hello.
Band Member #2: Play a song that we all know.
Band Member #1: Okay. I'll, I'll start this one. Ready? That's how I start it, in for into the drum parts.
Band Member #2: Rolling.

Do you hear that? Two-thirds of that was shit, that's what he said.

Yes, Aaron's a prick.

Let it stop ya from dancin', dancin'. Oh, yeah. If the rhythm gets ya goin' let it stop ya from dancin', dancin'. Oh, yeah.