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I ought to think myself a lucky girl, I know,
'Cos I'm engaged, but still, somehow, I don't think so.
John, that's the name of my "finnonce", you see
There's no mistake, he's very fond of me.
He took me out for walks, and oh! he was so nice!
He always used to kiss me on the same place twice.
Often in the park we would sit and spoon,
And I was oh! so happy till the other afternoon.
John took me round to see his mother!
His mother his mother!
And while he introduced us to each other
She weighed up everything that I had on.
She put me through a cross examination;
I fairly boiled with aggravation.
Then she shook her head,
Looked at me and said,
"Poor John! poor John!"
As soon as she could get me all alone oh, dear!
She asked so many questions that I felt quite queer.
Thought John too young to take a wife just yet;
Asked when and where it was that we first met.
She said no girl could help but worship her dear son,
And told me pretty plainly what a Prize I'd won.
Started fairly slow, then she made a spurt,
And hoped that I knew how to put a tailpiece on a shirt.
John took me round to see his mother!
His mother his mother!
And while he introduced us to each other
She weighed up everything that I had on.
She put me through a cross examination;
I fairly boiled with aggravation.
Then she shook her head,
Looked at me and said,
"Poor John! poor John!"
She said, " Young girls today are all for outside show;
The clothes you see may look all right the rest oh, no!".
What she was driving at I soon made out;
My style of dress was too refined, no doubt.
Then all at once she gave a sigh, And cried, "Oh lor!
I wonder what on earth he wants to marry for!".
That was quite enough, up my temper flew;
Says I, "Perhaps it's so that he can get away from you!".
John took me round to see his mother!
His mother his mother!
And while he introduced us to each other
She weighed up everything that I had on.
She put me through a cross examination;
I fairly boiled with aggravation.
Then she shook her head,
Looked at me and said,
"Poor John! poor John!"
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