FiMFlamFilosophy - Rainbow Fun Factory

You will be turned into rainbows
Everyone will be so happy!
You'll be gone but that's okay, though.
Hey, cheer up, it's not that crappy!

If you assume it your life goal
to convert into a rainbow
you'd dare not be disappointed
once I stuff you into this hole!

This is where we take your taxes,
where we make the weather wanted.
We're not chemists so don't ask us
how this method got so vaunted.

This job does not need a degree
that is how they got stuck with me.
I need this for healthcare, you see
so I can afford therapy!

Meng, there's a good reason, but that don't tell them nothing.

What do you mean? I need the friggin' health benefits.

That's it? What about the history?

The history is that I'm not going back to eleven twenty-five an hour, because I ate too much fast food, and it's really hard to pay my bilds.
Okay, I'll admit that they usually say you should do it for the love of the job and not the money, but the economy is rough right now and this is the best I could get.

You know what? Forget you! I'm gonna' explain it Losino style! Listen up kids!

Let's go back to a thousand years ago.
Everything you know is owned by Celestia.
The tiny blade of grass that fed on the sun.
The tiny grasshopper that fed on the grass.
The snake in the grass that fed on the grasshopper.
And the holy evil government owned by Celestia.

All things trod beneath an iron hoof
united, provided, divided by Celestia.
All hailed humbly to the mighty god.
Until one day

Then Came The War

Nightmare Moon
swept from the sky
lasers from her eyes
and teeth like knives!

The power of our god
was simply not enough
to overcome
her sister!

The one had sacrificed
a piece of her mind
to the dark gods
for deeds unkind!

Hope seemed lost
until the time
that Celestia

developed
a plan!

Pitch one power
to retain the rest!
Sacrifice in turn
was the gist.

With so many
what was one?
This foul war
must be done.

It must be something
she could do without.
A superfluous power
she could leave out.

She purveyed them all
and made her decision.
She rested her choice,
her prismatic precision.

No more rainbows
was her decree!
Equestria's ponies
would pay this fee!

But petty politics
sought another route!
The electorate
could not do without!

So the duty fell to the pegasi
And when they found the solution
they began to cry.

Oh no!

We can't procure pigments
without grinding our youth
into a fine mist of color,
and that is the truth!

But our pleas for reprieve
fell upon deaf ears!
And the exit polls
showed our greatest fears!

We must make rainbows
there wasn't a choice!
The boneheads and mud ponies
smothered our voice!

And so
We built
A machine!