Horrible Histories - The Blue Blooded Blues

[Robert III]
I bet you think the Stuarts
Were an English dynasty
[James VI]
But we only came to England
When the crown belonged to me
[Mary]
Our clan may hail from Scotland
But our tales are not a bonnie one, you'll see

[All]
We got the blue-blooded blues
In our blue Stuart shoes
[James VI]
Each king, queen and heir
Had our personal nightmare
[All]
Have you heard the news?
[Robert III]
We got the blue-blooded blues

Let's start with me, King Robert three
Some say I was a fool
Once fell off my horse and hurt myself
Quite badly, how uncool
Ended up with a limp
And limp was what they called my rule
And I tell you for why

[All]
We got the blue-blooded blues
Strapping sons, he had two
[Robert III]
One imprisoned, starved in jail
The other captured, epic fail
The worst of Kings, my review
I got the blue-blooded blues

[James VI]
The next five Stuarts all called James
But none was Lucky Jim
James one hid down a sewer
Got caught by assassins
James two was less unpopular
But killed by his own cannon, so pretty dim
[Robert III]
And it doesn't end there!
[James VI]
You're not wrong

[All]
We got the blue-blooded blues
So many ways to lose
[James VI]
Three and four killed in battle
Five lost at war and that'll
[All]
Explain why we don't enthuse
About those Stuart clan blues

[James VI]
Sing it Mary, go on girl!

[Mary]
I'm Mary, Queen of Scots
And misfortune I had lots
To Queen Liz was a threat
She threw me into prison, yet
Still accused me of plottin'
Can you see where I'm headed
Liz is a Tudor, take a guess
[Robert III]
Beheaded?
[Mary]
Yeah!

[James VI]
Well, after Queen Liz died
I was made King of England too
Became James the First in England
But the Stuart luck stayed true
Guy Fawkes tried to blow me up
And turn me into Stuart stew
[Mary]
One more time!
[James VI]
Yeah!

[All]
We got the blue-blooded blues
Not the role that you'd choose
[James VI]
With my son Charles a decapitee
We briefly killed off royalty
[All]
Stuart monarchs it's true
[Robert III]
Cursed with the blue-blooded blues

That's what I'm talking about